I prowl the sidewalk, wary of the hundreds of people around me, hurrying to get to wherever they need to be. I have no destination, unless you count running away from the inevitable, which it doesn’t.
The sun is in the sky, shining down upon the bundled-up citizens below. I feel it warm my skin, the only comfort I ever get, and I remember the times before, back when things were better. But a cold gust of wind wakes me from my reminiscing, as if reminding me of the present.
I can feel him inside my mind, scratching, clawing, begging me to let him out, to let him feed. He’s too impatient. I allow him to feed once every night, or he’ll rampage again.
“Let me out!” He bellows, his cries making my mind vibrate. No one else hears his voice, so they only see me clutch my head and murmur, “Not yet, not now.”
The hours pass by, and soon there is no one left on the street, just me and my shadow, and my shadow is bored. His voice grates on my nerves, causing headaches and making my life miserable. “This life is a bore. You do nothing but walk all day, don’t bother to eat or sleep! I feel like I’m the only one who’s doing anything, but you only let me out at night! You’re always such a wuss.”
“Shut up!” I snap, knowing that it was no use. My blood boils, my face red with frustration. Day in and day out, he would complain and insult me. He thought he was tired? My life was ruined because of him, my family gone, with no one to turn to, as I get blamed for the Wolf’s actions.
Though I was tired. I’d been walking for days now, not trusting myself to fall asleep. Then again, I would surely collapse if I didn’t rest anytime soon. It’s funny, you’d figure that once I become the Wolf, I’d get some rest. But no, it’s like I’m half-asleep, resting but not fully unconscious, like being stuck in a nightmare.
Thankfully, I have the day to myself to enjoy a life that I control; the only downside is the Wolf speaking to me, urging me to kill, to be a monster like himself. I won’t give in, but the nagging’s enough to drive me crazy.
My stomach growls. I don’t usually eat during the day, as we get plenty to eat at night when I let the Wolf out to hunt, but sometimes I can’t help craving a snack from time to time.
I gaze around lazily, my eyes coming to rest on a nearby coffee shop. Perfect. I’m not one for coffee, usually preferring caffeinated sodas to that bitter brown liquid, but today I’m wanting something stronger. I feel in my pocket for the bit of cash I took off a victim a while back. This should be enough.
I cross the street to the coffee shop and enter. It’s a rather ordinary coffee shop, with tile floors and smooth walls, tables lined up against the wall and spread across the floor. The menu is written on a blackboard behind the counter, where several baristas in green aprons stand and take orders. The smell of coffee and cream hit my nose, jolting my enhanced senses.
I hurry and order my coffee, taking a seat in the corner to wait for it to come out. I’m so tired, but I can’t help fidgeting. Something weighs on my mind, keeping me from relaxing. I’ve tried to suppress it, but I can’t help but think about them.
I haven’t seen them for years, ever since that one fiasco, back when I thought I could fight the Wolf. Dozens died, and from the shadows I watched men in suits come to the scene. They didn’t put up any police tape or call for reinforcements. They just collected bits and pieces left over from the massacre and put them in plastic bags, then they drove off. I never forgot them, and I never lost the fear that they’re following me to this day, trying to find me, for what I can only imagine.
One of the baristas calling my name with my order woke me from my thoughts. I pick up my coffee and sit back for a while, sipping quietly as I continue to think, the same questions as always resurfacing. Were they with the government? Did they want to dissect me? Are they still following me even now?
Before I know it, I’ve finished my coffee, and yet I feel the same: tired, hungry, and paranoid. I feel something within me stir, something instinctive, and I tense. I snap my head up just in time to see a kid a bit older than me walking across the coffee shop, followed by his friends, snickering amongst each other. Well, that doesn’t bode well.
I know what he’s going to do. A dirty kid walks in, dressed in rags, pays with cash, and sits alone in the corner. The way he sees it, his afternoon entertainment has arrived. And so, thinking it the best thing to do, I stand.
The boy looks like he wants to push me back down, but he puts his cocky smirk back into place as he stops in front of me. “Can I help you?” I ask him, trying to keep my voice pleasant and not gruff as it’s gotten.
“Hm… No,” He says. “I was actually going to ask you the same thing. Maybe I could loan you some soap?” His lackeys guffawed, finding his scornful joke hilarious.
I sit back down in my seat, glaring in front of me. “Leave me alone.”
Of course, he doesn’t leave. Instead, he sits across from me and gets all up in my face. “Oh, what’s wrong, tough guy? Don’t want to get in a fight today, you dirty whelp?”
I growl, feeling my blood boil. This wasn’t going to go well. I grit my teeth. “You’re right, I don’t.” I clench my fists, which quiver violently under the table.
“Really? That’s a shame, kid, because you happen to have a very punchable face.” The boy says plainly, insulting me almost casually. His lackeys laugh some more, oblivious that they’re poking a bear.
I ignore the laughter, though. Instead, I glare at the jerk-face in front of me, smirking triumphantly, like he just won an award. He’ll win something, alright.
The Wolf is rocking inside my mind, snarling and gnashing his teeth. “Kill him!” He howls, his voice echoing in my mind. “Let me rip him apart!” It was tempting, but I’ve learned to ignore such temptations.
I take a deep breath to steady myself, to clear my mind, and then I lunge forward. I grab him by the collar of his shirt and pull him towards me. “Listen here, you little punk,” I snarl in his ear, “You approached me seeking prey, and you’ve found a predator. Don’t make me show my claws.” He looks into my eyes and screams. I blink. What’s up with him? I look down at my hands and arms, and I see what’s wrong.
Fur begins to cover my arms, and my fingers have claws on the tips, digging into the boy’s skin. He begins to squirm like a child, crying for help. I drop him to the floor, and he crawls desperately away, breathing heavily.
I curse under my breath as the fur thickens. I look around the room, seeing horrified faces staring at me. The customers, the barista, everyone, staring at me, transfixed to the spot.
I need to get out of here. I get up, knocking over the table. The coffee cup hits the floor with a tinkle, sending shards across the tile. They all sit and stare, too scared to move, as I leave the coffee shop, already halfway through becoming the Wolf.
I sprint across the street and hide in an alley, every muscle tensed. I take several deep breaths, massaging my arms and willing them to relax. The fur recedes, and the claws disappear, and I stand there quivering. That was close.
“Dammit.” The Wolf curses quietly. He knows when he’s beaten and doesn’t say anything more.
I slump against a brick wall, sitting on the coarse concrete floor. I’m breathing heavily. The people in the coffee shop think they’re scared? I’ve never been so close to becoming the Wolf in ages. If he’d managed to gain enough control, he would have ripped that kid’s head off and then silenced all the witnesses.
Anyhoo, I’m exhausted. Struggling for control of your body can really take it out of you. I let my head lean against the wall and close my eyes. I’ve been due for a nap for a long time.
But then I hear the sirens.
Crap.
The Monster Within 